FAMILY  -  KIDS MONEY PLOYS
 
 

Some Common Kids' Money Ploys and Their Answers:

 
Don't fall for this: It's an age-old bargaining technique that you have probably used yourself. If it seems as if everyone your child knows is getting spoiled, look into it. Chances are she's exaggerating. If she's not, she gets a firsthand lesson on the injustices of wealth distribution.
 
 

 
Tell him how much you can pitch in for his shoes budget, and let him cover the difference. But remember, your contribution had better be fair. Unless you're really strapped for cash, don't force your child to undergo the humiliation of showing up in school with a pair of neon red bargain sneakers from a warehouse past the city limits. This sort of thing can be intensely damaging to a child's psyche. Figure out how much a pair of decent sneakers really costs. Also, remember that your kid is constantly subjected to advertising that has been specially designed to sucker him. Watch TV with him and teach him about advertising tricks: He'll probably be fascinated by the corruption of the industry. Go to stores with him so he can see for himself the difference between the giant slime-monsters in the ooze kingdom on TV and the cheap plastic dolls that drip goo out of their mouths in the box.
 
 

 
This sort of thing is pretty complicated: There are some things that your child will view with something akin to religious awe and will therefore have trouble relating to your concerns about its price. Imagine if your long-dead idol (Napoleon or Elvis or whoever) were coming to town for a series of lectures or performances. You would probably be willing to dish out big bucks to see the great man or woman in the flesh. As harsh as it may seem, putting your foot down is often the best solution, providing you explain why. If she's getting an allowance, you can encourage her to plan ahead and save up for these things. Reward her discipline by matching her savings, or at least chipping in a little. If your child is old enough, try some hands-on treatment: Make her do the bills one month, and let her see how much is left.
 
 

In the long run, she will learn not from your long speeches about when you were a child, but from how you behave now. If you trade in your car for the new model with the talking sun roof, then trade that in two years later because the manufacturer has finally introduced one with a distinguished burgundy paint job, your child is unlikely to learn good spending habits. On the other hand, she needs to realize that you have a little more leverage than she when it comes to family finances. "When you're supporting yourself, you can buy as many central remote-control systems as you like" will suffice, even if you did just buy one for your own study. Or a simple line my mother always used whenever I announced that I wanted anything: She would simple reply wistfully, "I want a big coffee ice cream soda." After about ten or twelve years, I got the point.
 
 

 
Again, your kid is smarter than he's letting on. It doesn’t take much to realize that there's a difference between relatives you only see occasionally and the immediate family. Point this out in a friendly manner, making it clear that you know that he understands. His act may require an expression of dumbfounded bewilderment, but he will still love you.
 
 

 
You are raising a mercenary. Your child needs to be aware of her responsibilities around the house that have nothing to do with money. This can be difficult: If she knows that she'll get her allowance whether or not she does her chores, she might be doubly inspired to go to the arcade and forget the trash. You'll have to work out some other kind of disciplinary system -- perhaps suspending her TV privileges for the week. A good middle ground is to have additional, optional chores that are linked to payment: baby-sitting, mowing the lawn, cleaning the garage.
 
 

 
Hear, hear! Unless you have an angel in your fold, no kid in his right mind is going to look far enough ahead to save money for serious later expenses. You can nurture those tendencies, however, by getting him started on smaller projects with clearer, sooner rewards. Like those New Kids on the Block tickets. By the time he's seventeen or eighteen, you'll be surprised how mature he's become about saving.